People like to give me advice.
“Do your best.” “Don’t push yourself so hard.” “Take more classes.” “Take fewer classes.” “Help me with the computer.” “You spend to much time on the computer.” At least these are overt examples.
Yesterday, at a thanksgiving dinner, my grandmother’s friend asked, “Are you letting your hair grow long?” I knew exactly where this was going and responded, “Yes, is that a problem?” So, of course, she mentioned that my response was rude. Then she went on to ask, “Are you planning to put curlers in it?” She was insinuating that I wanted to look like a girl, or something along those lines. Who is the one being rude here? My grandmother interjected at this point explaining that she was the one that asked me to grow my hair long in the first place. I generally try to say as little as possible to avoid annoyances like this. Everyone I come into contact with has such superficial thoughts.
Today I received a letter from my grandmother on the east coast. The letter said nothing of the newspaper clippings enclosed. There were two complete articles out of the opinion section of the Patriot. Both articles were poorly researched and poorly written. One was about net neutrality and the other about people spending too much of their lives in front of a computer screen. I doubt the clippings were sent to me about net neutrality, so I have this to say, “If I were a field biologist, you’d be telling me I spend too much time outside.” I’m a computer science major, so I use computers.
People used to get yelled at for spending all their time writing to pen-pals. “Go outside and make some real friends.” Then they got yelled at for using the phone. “Why don’t you just go over to their house?” The current trend is social networking sites. “Get off the computer!” The fact of the matter is that the concept hasn’t changed. People will seek like-minded individuals so that they may discuss their interests on an equal level. The medium of communication is far less important than the content. That isn’t to say that social networking sites are intrinsically better than in-person communication. However, trying to force people to settle for less invigorating conversation isn’t exactly a solution to the “real friends” problem.
No two people seem to have exactly the same beliefs, so you are always doing something wrong from someone’s perspective. What really matters is whether or not you hurt other people. If your action (or inaction) causes people harm, you are doing something wrong. Otherwise, be happy and share your joy.